Brian Cancer

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My husband Brian was to go through many a cancer operation on his face, hands and body, this started in the 1990s on his lip and then it was his forehead twice, the first one was a little one. I was outside the room, when I saw the Dr. come out, he was all coved in blood so I asked him how Brian was and he told me OK, but I had to see Brian for myself and then Brian came walking out and said “Come on now home we go.”


He told me that he was put into twilight sleep and that when they went over the parts which they had not numb, it really hurt him and he was to go back again because they had not got it all. So one month later Brain was called to go up to the hospital for the next operation and I made sure that I was there, I told them that they had to put Brain out to it and that they did not have to listen to Brian telling me about hearing the cuts and seeing all the blood when the Dr. accidentally cut the wrong artery. Brian saw all the blood and told me that it came out like a hose. I told them that they were not going to put my husband through that again.

Well you should have heard the female Dr. who was going to ad mister the anesthetic for Brian and told us that he did not need to be put out for a head operation which would be much bigger than the first one, it was three inches long and they were going to cut out deeper and longer this time round, so four inches deep and six inches long. Brian said Mum it will be alright, they will put me into twilight sleep and I will not see or hear anything this time. I said, "No Brian, it will be worse because they are going deeper and longer, so you do need to sleep through this one.

Oh! No says I, to the Dr. you are not married to Brian, you do not know my husband,. He feels brave now, while talking to you but when he gets home it is another story. You are to put him to sleep, so he can not hear the cuts or see the blood and then if you have to go deeper he will not know anything and I think that it will be best for him to be put out with the anesthetic also because of his heart. Oh Dear, She sadly said, right we will see you next week. Brian was so please when we left the hospital and told me I was right as he was so scared at the first operation and this was why he did not say much to the Dr.


As well as Brian going to have the cancer operation on his forehead done he also had the cancer on his hands cut out or burnt off. It was so hard for me to watch him go through this and all he would say was ouch! for a while and then you would see it go black, then fall off.


The second head operation went well and after a month Brian’s salivary glands in front of his right ear came up and would not go down, he kept going to his Dr. who would tell him not to worry, it will come down soon. But what I saw was that it was getter bigger each week so Brian was then sent up to the hospital for biopsies and they found that it was cancer. Brian had another operation on the right side of his face about two inches long and you would never believe it still did not come down, it was bigger than it was before the operation.


Brain was sent to Auckland hospital to see a Professor Shaw a specialist in cancer of the head and he sent Brian in for another cat-scan which Brian had in Auckland Hospital. When he called Brian back he told Brian that the chance of not getting it all was 50/50 and that if he did not get it all it could be fatal. I said it will be okay Brian, Look at what you have been through all these years with the other cancer operations, we will go through th is together and it will not be so hard for you.


We had being in touch with the Cancer Society who helped us so muc h before and while my husband was in the Auckland Hospital I was  in the Domain lodge which was for the cancer patients and their families and one person could stay their for free and all tha t I did was to pay for food which I cooked each day. It was like a holiday with the pain of seeing Brian each day going through the operation and his pain.

We  were down there for a week and Brian was then to go through radiation treatme nt for 20 snap as Brian says. This was all done in 2001. Since Brian had to go down to Auckland for radiation treatme nt we had to go to get Brian fitted with a head mask w hich will tie him tight to the table so as he could not more and they marked the mask where they were to work on to the side of Brian’ s face.


A week later we went down to The Domain Lodge in Auckland and we both stayed there through the full 20days which were at 7 am each week day, so we stayed there for the weekends as well as we saw no reason to go home and then go down again wasting money traveling back and forth all the time. We walked over to the hospital each day at 6/30 am to make time for Brian’s appointment at 7am and after that Brian would sleep most of the time while I went for walks around Auckland or get a bus for $1.00 and go sightseeing to make us e of the time I had down there.


While waiting for Brian as he went through the saps each day the room he was in would have a little red light on the door telling us not to go there as the Radiation was in use and it only took a few seconds to do and the getting the mask on then strapping the mask to the table so Brian could not move his face, took half hour and the wait was worth it.


In the meantime I was going through with the mediation for the 24years of abuse to me in two catho lic church orphanages and we left the Auckland hospital to go to Christchurch for the first Mediation in 2001 with the Good Shepherd order of nuns for the first 10years of abuse in my life. while in their care.

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